The bookaholic is back. Wow, that was a long break.
I’m BACK, I’M BACK!
YEEHAWWWWW!!!!
All right, people, for all of you who didn’t know Ilona Andrews’s released her latest book like, a LONG TIME ago, the gorgeous and totally not my Fire is out by Kristin Cashore, and a lot of other interesting and possibly life changing books are out. Just to let you know.
OOPS!!! Gotta go check me email. Bye-peoples.
How’s THAT for an original title??
Anyhoo, this is what little old me has been up to:
1) Ranting mentally about what books no sane person should ever have to read. Sparkly corpse books, books with blue-haired guys and HORRIBLE romances (for the girl in all of us), sappy teenage books about finding your INNER self (with the help of the DASHING young best friend who understands ALL your problems), action books with no villain. Like, at ALL.
2) Wondering why in the world so many people on Earth think I am a quiet, lovable, innocent person. Hello!!!??? I write a blog. I love loud music where I can feel the bass. (That is so unbelievable awesome.) I couldn’t care less what happens to you when you come withing spitting distance of three-week old guacamole.
3) Surfing the Internet. If you don’t know already, ILONA ANDREWS has released their next book, the first On the Edge Novel. If I wasn’t in such a hyper mood, I’d probably give you a description, but that should come later anyway.
Oh, and did you know how totally wicked myspace is? I mean, annoying when you find people you know and their profiles are BLOCKED because they think you are a reclusive and silent hermit with no . . .
Wait a second, didn’t I already get into this??
4) Turning in papers at the last possible minute, realizing I made a mistake and then going back to thankfully not kiss anything but the professor’s feet.
5) Eating horribly digusting lunches at the school cafeteria. Did you realize there are some types of macaroni and cheese where the cheese is on TOP of the macaroni and is disectable? As in, you can take those accident-safe utensils, poke the cheese, and it WIGGLES ON ITS OWN?????!!!!
6) Ordering books from the library. Not thinking about the book reviews I owe the world. Honestly, someone might pick some of these up and think they’re actually GOOD.
7) Cursing, mentally, the library system when they don’t have the books I want. Need. Same difference.
Giggling out loud when the people on myspace are SO lying through their booty cracks. Oh, my tummy.
9) Reviewing the basic principle of my belief that boys/”ahem” men are worthless. They do pay for dinner sometimes, and their jackets are so warm, and we mustn’t forget, their big, broad back muscles are so unbelievable perfect for towing all our shopping bags around.
It’s destiny.
Hmm, is there anything else important I ought to mention??
Nah.
It’s was so fun getting all that inner anxiety out to such a patient audience. I don’t know what I’d ever do without ya.
Title: Confessions of An Ugly Stepsister Author: Gregory Maguire
Pages: 368 Series:
Other Info: Published by Harper, 1999
Description: We have all heard the story of Cinderella, the beautiful child cast out to slave among the ashes. But what of her stepsisters, the homely pair exiled into ignonimy by the fame of their lovely sibling? What fate befell those untouched by beauty . . . and what curses accompanied Cinderella’s looks?
Set against the backdrop of seventeenth-century Holland, Confessions of An Ugly Stepsister tells the story of Iris, an unlikely heroine who finds herself swept from the lowly streets of Haarlem to a strange world of wealth, artifice, and ambition. Iris’ path quickly becomes intertwined with that of Clara, the mysterious and unnaturally beautiful girl destined to become her sister. While Clara retreats to the cinders of the family hearth, Iris seeks out the shadowy secrets of her new household – and the treacherous truth of her former life.
Review: I liked the plot, and the outtake on the Cinderella story was pretty cool. I felt that all the characters seemed developed the same amount, and that the main character didn’t get too shine more than any other character. There was a diverse array of characters, but none of them seeme to get any more love with me than the rest of them. While in some books this is a good thing, in this one I wanted to hear the ugly sister’s story. The ending left a lot hanging, and the epilogue seemed to tell what happened and not actually live it.(although I loved the twist about the epilogue) Also the actual “Cinderella” part of the story seemed a little bit rushed. Iris was still a good character though. I felt that she grew during the story, and that her look on the tale was a unique one.
Again, I feel that this version of Cinderella was very interesting. The author did a great job in showing the story, and each character was able to develop as much as the rest of them. There was a tiny romance involved, though that never really got to be solved.
Most of the story focuses on the inner relationships of the family, and at times it moved rather slowly. Overall, 3.5 out of 5. It was a decent fantasy novel, but the ending was slightly disappointing. There seemed to be a LOT of symbols interworked in the story, and any of the characters seemed ot be symbols themselves.
You are sometimes SUNSHINE . . .
But-not-the only SUNSHINE . . .
You certainly are craZEE. . . But that’s OKAYayayay . . .
And if you’re feeling . . . Rather BLUE todayayayay . . .
Well-you-can-come-to-me-with-all-your-PROBLEMS . . .
I-can-put-sadness-to-the-tesssssssssst . . .
I-have-confidence-that-you-will-smile-agAIN . . .
Besides-what-you-see-I-HAVE-CONFIDENCE-IN- . . .GEICO . . .
Because every-time you talk . . . I know a secret . . . And everytime you cry . . . Icannot help but stare . . . And everytime you trust . . . they should know . . Its harder than a dare . . .
There you have it ladies and gentleman. My very first symphony. Oh, no, hold the applause, I’m in a modest mood today. Besides, I can’t credit the words as mine or I’ll get slapped with a lawsuit.
Please hum or belch lyrics to the tunes of You Are My Sunshine, some song from the Sound of Music, and Everytime We Touch.
Now I need chocolate.
All right ladies and gentleman. I have had it. I am now instituting some new rules for myself:
1) All book reviews currently in drafts must be finished this weekend, or in future references, by the following weekend.
2) There will be a two-hour respite from homework immediately following homework, as well as the return from school. During weekends all homework must be completed by Sunday 9:00 p.m.
3) I will not bully, tease, or antagonize my sister unles she REALLY deserves it. Or if she does it first. Or if I’m really bored.
4) I will no longer sink to the low level of promoting my own blog. I will let my friends do it for me.
5) I will try my darnedest to post at least once a week. Preferably on a Saturday.
6) I will attempt to broaden my reading selection. More fantasy. Less cheesy chic-flic novels. Oooh, more Juliet Marillier, maybe I can get my favorites from the library . . .
7) What in the world am I writing this list for again?
There, there. That sums up the full expanse of my avoidance policy. When I really don’t want to do it, I’ll make a list with it.
On books:
If anyone happens to see this blog and has a perfectly decent copy of Crashed by Robin Wasserman, I am willing to negotiate. If you accept currencies of pathetic slobberings or even piteous begging, please drop me a line.
I want it. Badly.
Title: Carpe Diem Author: Autumn Cornwell
Pages: 356 Series:
Other Info: Published by Feiwel and Friends, 2007
Description: “I’ve got my entire life planned out for the next ten years – including my PhD and Pulitzer Prize.” claims sixteen-year old overachiever Vassar Spore, the daughter of overachiever parents, who, in true overachiever fashion, named her after an elite women’s college. Vassar expects her sophomore summer to include both AP and AAP (Advanced Advanced Placement) classes. Surprise! Enter a world-traveling realtive whp send her plans into a tailspin when she blackmails Vassar’s parents into forcing their only child to backpack with her through Southeast Asia.
On a journey from Malaysia to Cambodia to the remote jungles of Laos, Vassar is faced with things she isn’t prepared for – adventure, danger, a Malaysian cowboy-slash-bodyguard her own age – and in learning to “live in the moment” uncovers a family secret that turns her world upside down.
Vassar Spore can plan on one thing; She’ll never be the same again.
Review: You would not believe what a nasty taste bad books leave in a reader’s mouth. Anything from a REALLY crappy romance, bad characterization, or absent plots can cause book-fanatics to wish they’d never been born.
Thankfully, then their friends present them with books like this one, and LIFE GOES ON.
Carpe Diem is about an overachiever. Vassar Spore is a sixteen-year old girl who wants to get into the college she was named after, graduate class valedictorian, create an academy for underprivileged children . . . the list goes on and on. And when her grandmother blackmails her parents into letting her “waste” her summer on a trip throughout Southeast Asia – without an itinerary – Vassar is simply along for the ride. Yeah, she tries to write a book, yeah she gets sick on guava, ohh, was I supposed to save that for later? Oops.
What I really liked about this book is that the author didn’t take up time in trying to sap up the character. Vassar planned everything, and at the end of the book she didn’t get one of those chic-flic epiphanies where “sometimes life takes a different path.” No, she planned, messed up, planned again, was taken hostage, made another plan, oops, that probably wasn’t the best idea either . . .
Her stubborness was slightly infuriating, but she grew on me. Sniffle.
And the author took the reader along for the ride as well. I got just enough background to make me happy, and plenty of thrills to keep me chortling. Actually, some of the funnies I was DOUBLING OVER, but hey, same difference.
My tummy still hurts.
And Hanks. Think hunk. Oops, gotta watch the rating. . . As the bodyguard/annoying pest, Hanks was unbelievably awesome. As another character, Hanks was deliciously awesome. And as the, um, cute Vassar-aged male, let’s just say Hanks filled his boots rather well.
Throughout the whole book there were plenty of EXTREMELY embarassing encounters, and Hanks was usually always there to add to the fun. ALWAYS. = D
And I really loved Grandma Gerd. The woman was spunky, artistic, and just plain crazy! Even if I saw the secret as an option, it was still a big BOOM in the book. And I’m glad the author followed through with it, and allowed the ending to be a good one for everybody.
And the twists in the book! Not to mention the hilarity and somewhat realism of it. The author held nothing back about living in a Third World country – from the bugs to the killer centipedes to the beauty to the squat toilets . . . Even if the ending was a little hurried, the book kept me flipping. True enough, I was left with questions at the end: Like did her Grandma want her to know the truth? and I will wait unpatiently for a sequel. (Just adding it to my list. Uhhh . . .) And there could have been more time with her parents and or her friends. (Although those nerdy pals were what really made the book fun)
There are a lot of things to love about this book: Vassar’s endless lists, Hanks infuriating personality, the Big Secret, Stick Girl, what happens when you sleep the wrong way, and how to get stuck in a toilet. Although technically I WINCED during the toilet part, but . . .
Overall, a 3.5 out of five. Read this book. Hold your tummy in. Never look at a cowboy the same way again . . . And remember, watch out for Polaroids!!
You never know when they’ll click.
Oh, I almost forgot . . .
LIM!
I really need to come up with more original post titles. I think I’ve already used this one before.
MY CURRENT TO-DO LIST
1) Reorganize notes
2) Clean room and prepare for POSSIBLE paint job.
3) Create index for blog. I think I mentioned this before, but it’ll hopefully be rather coolio.
4) Finish book reviews. Guys, I have like, six to go, not including the one for the book I’m reading now.
Among those finished are:
Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins
River Secrets by Shannon Hale
Daughter of the Forest by Juliet Marillier
Confessions of An Ugly Stepsister by Gregory Maguiere
Razor Girl by Marienne Mancusi
East by Edith Pattou
And let me tell you, that is a wide range of work right there.
5) I REALLY need to clean my room. Because I REALLY want to paint it, whether my mother completely agrees or not. (At least I have Dad on this.)
6) Search internet for room designs, finish personal art project, figure out the cute guy’s name in whatever period, yada yada yada. (Yeah, I know I said they’re worthless, but they are nice to look at. And zoos don’t have too many behind bars so . . . we girls just have to study in more dangerous environments.
Ahhhh, the world is spinning so fast.
I AM MISSING NORMALCY!! (normalicy . . . normalicee . . . oh whatever)
I have book reviews to write. Oops, and homework to do. Oh crap . . .
And I had a major rant worked up from pacing, AND I FORGOT IT!!
Something about the inefficiency of history professors with myspace pages . . . Oooh, I’ll save that for later . . . Or maybe it was that madness about that weird character on . . . OH! And I totally was going to spoil a buttload of books . . .
Kind of like this . . .
NOOOOO!! NOOOO! How could he do that? That pipsqueak excuse for a . . . Awwwwww, dat’s so sweeeeet . . . They call that a romance? I make more cow eyes with my movie posters . . . Umm, do they offer ratings for these books? I don’t think I should be reading this . . . BACK OFF YOU SLIMY BUTTHEAD! THE OTHER DUDE IS HOTTER THAN YOU AND . . . Omgosh. Omgosh. Omgo . . . Heheheheh. Is there a Don’t-try-this-at-home label, because that would be SO fun . . . No wonder they gave that low ratings on Amazon . . . SEQUEL! SEQUEL! PLEASE AUTHOR, WRITE FASTER – WAIT, they said that wasn’t their fault, hmm, PUBLISHER, GET WITH IT!!! . . . *sobs* . . . YAYYYYYYY!!!!! HAHA! I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! *stows in bag to show friends* . . .
I think I’m going to paint my room. And rearrange my fantabulous bookshelves. Won’t that be fun? And I get to clean them, too . . .
Weirdness is my label. Don’t overuse it.
Oh, and all of you who haven’t already, there’s this really cool song based off of Mordred of the King Arthur stories . . . you know?
Either go on youtube and type in “Mordred’s Lullaby” or go to Ilona Andrews blog (http://ilona-andrews.com and click on the “Blog”) and scroll down a couple of posts. I guess you could read them, too, she is rather funny.
Like maddeningly funny. And we all do love Curran . . .
Title: Bloom Author: Elizabeth Scott
Pages: 231 Series:
Other Info: Published by Simon Pulse, 2007
Description: Lauren has a good life, decent grades, great friends, and a boyfriend every girl lusts after. So why is she so unhappy?
It takes the arrival of Evan Kirkland for Lauren to figure out the answer: she’s been holding back. She’s been denying herself a bunch of things because staying with her loyal and gorgeous boyfriend, Dave is the “right” thing to do. After all, who would give up the perfect guy?
But as Dave starts talking more and more about their life together, planning a future Lauren simply can’t see herself in – and as Lauren’s craving for Evan, and moreover, who she is with Evan becomes all the more fierce – Lauren realizes she needs to make a choice . . . before one is made for her.
Review: Honestly, I don’t know how I do it. How do I manage to walk into a library, filled with hundreds (including reference) of books, and manage to pick one like this?
And before you get confused, that’s not necessarily a good thing.
The last Elizabeth Scott book I read, Perfect You, I actually halfway liked. To be completely fair to both that book and all the other good chik-fliks out there, I’m not entirely sure they both are written by the same person.
I try very hard to not be mean in my reviews, but this book just made me extremely disappointed. The overall theme was okay – should you go with a safe relationship or one that makes you feel - but the characters, ugh.
For one thing, Lauren really did a majority of two things in this book. In the first half, she pined over Evan. In the second half, she obsessed over what to do about Evan.
I mean, there were her friends and such, Gail and Katie were both interesting characters, but the main thing all boiled down to this:
Evan or not with Evan, that be the question of my soul??? *Add swoony hearts here*
It was infuriating. I don’t mind sappiness, when there’s conversations and actual reason behind it. Here it was all googly eyes and raggedly whispering each other’s name. Oh, sorry, bad image. But I don’t think I could count on my fingers and toes the number of times she used his name . . . EVEN ON A PAGE!!!!
And Evan deserved so much more in the first place, and so did Dave. The only halfway fair relationship was either the gay girl’s or Katie and Marcus’ and they were just secondary characters!
And while Lauren’s family did make an appearance in the book, they didn’t really seem to be there for any purpose other than to characterize Lauren. Characters are supposed to stand on their own, and while characters can use each other to find boundaries, they should actually breathe themselves.
In Bloom, I seemed to have a silent mantra of “Get A Life. Get A Life. GetALife.”
Overall, I give this book a 3.5 out of five. Admittedly, there were some interesting parts to the book, and I really did love Dave and Evan, but I wouldn’t buy this book if I were looking for a really good one. The beginning was much better than the end, and unless you’re a mega fan of Scott, I would pick this up from the library.
I have so MANY book reviews to write. OMgolly.
You guys bear with me as I rant . . .
Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins came out yesterday and as of right now I have not read it yet. I bought it for a friend’s birthday and the trip home was AGONY! But the look on her face . . . hehehe.
At the current moment I’m in the middle of like, three books. It’s a horrid thing to do, I know, but good gracious school is WASTING my energy. Just getting between classes tuckers me out, and now I’m supposed to get up to date on my reviews??
Haha.
But anyway, sooner or later you’ll have reviews for a whole sleuth of books.
See you at the other end.
